Graduating as a Parent

More than three years ago, in early 2023, I wrote a post about “What to Do When You Can’t Do Much – Dad Edition”.

Nothing could have prepared me then for the maelstrom of challenges that awaited right around the corner. Now, three years later, so much has changed and so fast. I liken my experience thus far to sailing the stormy seas aboard a rickety boat. From a multitude of health issues to layoffs and personal losses, it has been a vicious cycle of emotional and mental whiplash. But, throughout it all, there has been a steadying presence in my life. The same presence whose company I spoke about in my old post: my daughter.

While I’m still the full-time work-at-home father, my daughter has graduated from being a baby to an actual “kid”. Back in 2023, I described the transformation of designing my life around my child’s needs as a major challenge. A family friend commented then that things would get easier as my daughter gets older, and that I would become nostalgic about these hard times. For a guy running on 4-5 hours of sleep, that statement was neither convincing nor encouraging.

In retrospect, I find myself completely agreeing with it. Becoming a father is the best thing that has ever happened to me. For one, your kid makes you realize how important it is to keep track of your own health. Why? Because that is the only way you can keep up with them. The same applies on the mental front. Kids draw so much from their parents’ emotional and mental energies. In my case, my daughter has become my pillar of motivation. I’ve leaned on her support as much as she continues to lean upon mine.

We are now a few days away from her preschool graduation, and to be honest, it kind of feels like a mini graduation for me as a parent. The last five years of my life have been a roller coaster of lost dreams, career derailments, personal loss, and just about all the chaos one could ask for. I certainly am not where I wanted to be five years ago. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’ve made progress in areas that I originally thought impossible.

For starters, I’m now working full-time as a freelancer and gradually building a committed career in the creative arts. I’ve become a published science writer and have continued to pitch successfully. I’ve even become more consistent in writing this blog!

In a few more days, I get to graduate from the slight stupor of the last five years and become more productive in my professional ambitions. It is a “productivity” honed and sharpened by the wisdom I have gained as a father, all thanks to my lovely daughter, who also gets to explore a new world of her own. We are both taking small steps towards bigger victories, and while it may seem to be at a slow pace, if there is one thing I have learned, life isn’t always about how fast you reach your goals, but about what you learn along the way.

“Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.” – Robert Collier