Tag: Life

Top 10 Things I Have Learned as a Rookie Dad from my Baby Daughter

Irrespective of the fact if you have a baby daughter or son, I’m sure rookie dads all around the world will find something in common to what my list has to offer.

I, for one, have learned much since my baby daughter arrived. These lessons have ranged from small pearls of wisdom to unexpected surprises. No matter the nature of my learning, the takeaway is the happiness I experience in its wake, in this moment, growing with my child and seeing the world through her eyes.

Let us get started.

1. Sleep is underrated.

This one is pretty obvious. I have had my fair share of late nights and the occasional all-nighter during my time at university. Going into this baby business, my confidence was right up there. I should be able to handle some late nights, right?

Yeah, not really. Never have I realized the value of sleep like I do now.

Not when these late nights become a regularity over several months. Never have I felt more tired! Squeezing in those power naps really became a priority so I could balance out with my wife on taking care of the little rebel.

What matters is that my baby girl gets her beauty sleep because a happy baby is better than a cranky one. It is a real power struggle.

2. There is a new boss in the house.

Power is a complicated thing. My wife and I got pretty good at this game. After having gone through various phases of our life together, we’ve learned to work as a team and function as a solid and cohesive unit. After all, team work is the best.

I think not.

That doesn’t really matter so much for our baby girl. In her opinion, you either take power or you don’t. She is the new boss of the house, and in being bossy, she makes us do all sorts of things, starting with absolutely nothing.

3. Doing absolutely nothing is awesome.

When you spend a good decade, jumping from one class to the next, doing assignments, prepping for exams, graduating from university, looking for jobs, and so on and so forth, you sometimes forget the value of just sitting down and doing absolutely nothing.

Sometimes, by doing absolutely nothing, you get a whole lot of something.

One of the best parts about being a dad for me is to look back at my day and realize I have accomplished practically nothing. That’s alright though, because that “nothing” is filled with doing everything I can to keep my baby girl happy and nothing is better than seeing her smile.

4. Inspiration is just around the corner.

As an aspiring writer and artist, spending time with my baby girl has become my greatest source of creativity and inspiration. Every day becomes an adventure!

I love the experience that is growing with my baby girl, and learning to see the world through her eyes.

Not only has it made me work harder toward my own dreams but it comes with additional benefits in kindling ideas for my stories and artwork. At this rate, my baby daughter will be a contributing author in my works. The main point is to be in the moment, and relish it.

5. Being in the moment.

As a dad, all of a sudden, there is so much to think about, from the then, the now, and the what comes after. It became quite stressful. But I’ve realized that with my baby girl, what matters is being in the moment.

Inner peace…

I have no idea what is going to happen in the future, and there is no point in worrying endlessly about it. I can learn from the mistakes I’ve made in the past but I cannot get overly critical of myself. What matters is the now, where there are so many precious moments to indulge in and relish.

And when the now gets to be too much, taking a break also comes in handy. Being in the moment helps with that too, and that has been a valuable lesson for a dad like me who often thinks too many things at the same time.

6. No need to go to the gym.

Having hit 30, for some reason, my brain must have sent memos to all my body parts stating that their warranty is over. Cue muscle spasms, shoulder aches, and all sorts of things that I have never had to deal with in my life. It was time to hit the gym again but with Covid-19 still going strong, I wasn’t too comfortable with that either.

Exercising and physical health is important when a baby is around.

Funnily enough, my baby girl has facilitated this: from regular walks in the neighborhood, and lots of action around the house from bicep/tricep curls, sit-ups, squatting, all of which can be done while entertaining my baby girl. No need for a gym membership. Exercising also keeps my mental health primed.

7. Thinking on your feet.

And that is important, because with my baby daughter I’ve learned the importance of thinking on my feet.

Expect the unexpected eh?

My baby girl is quite the explorer so what may hold her attention now may no longer interest her a few minutes later. This can get annoying, but that’s where patience comes in.

8. Patience is a virtue.

It truly is. Babies are fun but god they are also extremely difficult. I love my baby daughter, but every now and then my wife and I would feel overwhelmed with what she is throwing at us.

Patience really helped in seeing the bigger picture.

Its something I had to drill into my head because babies can be difficult in different ways every day.

Why? Because they are learning so much every single instance. If I can get overwhelmed just by having to do two or three activities at the same time, I cannot imagine the information input my baby daughter goes through everyday.

Plus, it really helped my wife. And on that note…

9. Moms are amazing.

Truly. Seeing what my wife does, night in and night out, I am at a loss for words at the pure energy (fueled by love, frustration, lots of fatigue, and just a relentless will) she displays in taking care of our baby girl.

When I expressed my amazement to my wife, her response was, “I know I’m awesome.”

Much respect for all the moms out there, especially during these tough times. It is in that amazement that I’m also driven as a dad to do my best, if not better, to not only make my baby girl happy but also my wife.

I’ve learned that I don’t have to think too hard about it. A small bucket of ice-cream, and tagging in with the baby girl, goes a long way.

10. Life, Love, and Laughter.

Which brings me to the greatest and best lesson of all.

Learning to take in life as it is, sharing all the love you have to offer, and laughing as much you can.

That really is the secret recipe. Both my wife and my baby daughter have taught me this and it has made my life all the better. Not to mention, it is extremely motivating in whatever I do and has made my experience as a dad all the more enjoyable.

And that’s it for my list. Now, seeing that it is my turn to tag in, I shall bid adieu to you my readers! I will be back with another post very soon!

This is the Way…

It has been an exhilarating summer. A sleepless one as well, especially over the last month, as my wife and I have swung from one all-nighter to another taking care of our lovely little baby daughter.

On a positive note, the experience has bestowed upon me the gift of patience. I put it to good use, facing a hectic schedule when I had to complete my doctoral defense (which was a success) while balancing my freelance gigs, and a healthy dose of job applications.

Opportunities have come accompanied with many customary rejections but I continue to hold my head high. It wouldn’t be any fun if it weren’t a challenge to get to my goals. On that note, science writing keeps on rolling as I churn out one script after another for WatchMojo Unveiled and PBS Spacetime so keep a lookout for The Procrastinating Scientist who will be visiting very soon.

Since completing my doctoral studies, my days have revolved around diaper session and playtime. Interestingly, spending time with my baby daughter has been a wholesome source of inspiration. Just as she has begun to settle into a sleep schedule, I have found an equal opportunity in making the jump to finish my graphic novel script.

It has been nearly six months since I touched the drafts. The extended break, I hope, will serve me well in providing new perspective as I compile the final version of the script. Supplementing this project is the fact that I have also registered for the Story Artist Mentorship program which promises to be one heck of a ride.

Last year’s Lightbox Expo was instrumental in helping me find inspiration toward a career in art and illustration. We are off to good start so far with my baby girl giving me the high-five on committing to a hellish schedule of writing and art work. Either way, she intends to act upon a 24/7 availability for my wife and myself, so why not use that time to get some work done as well.

Now that we are all caught up, I must now leave, as my little one seems to be chewing on something a lot more suspicious than the teether I left her with, while Mommy is taking a nap. I will be back very soon with a new post!

Turning 30 and all that comes with it!

The Big 3 & 0

A few weeks ago, I finally entered the big leagues, welcomed by a mini-pantheon of close friends who had beat me to the 30s. My wife, on the other hand, relished the moment as she is still in her 20s. For now, I’m letting her have the fun, though the countdown has begun for her remaining months before she joins the gang.

We conducted a small celebration at home, made all the more special by the presence of a lovely angel, my baby daughter, who incidentally also turned 3 months old. To top it all off, I finally got my FIRST EVER tasting of tiramisu cake!

And it was YUMMY!

It would later dawn on me that with my 30th birthday I had now spent a third (and a little more) of my life in Edmonton, having first landed in the city in 2009 for my undergraduate studies at the University of Alberta.

I would spend the night reminiscing upon my adventures since then, having accumulated 12 years worth of wonderful memories in this city. With a few more weeks to go until my doctoral defense, it certainly felt daunting that the years had flown by so fast. At the end of the day, I’m thankful to all the wonderful people I have come to meet over these years, and of course the enduring support of my wife, family, and friends!

Enduring a Heat Wave & Getting Vaccinated

Speaking of endurance, the first challenge of my 30th birthday would be a painful heat wave cooking most of Western Canada, for well over a week. My body adapted readily by recalling its prior memories living in the heat of Egypt and Sudan.

Unfortunately, the going would be tough on my wife and my baby daughter. What had once been the bliss of beautifully maintained sleep schedules and playtime hours would be overturned in a chaotic, sweaty, and tiring frenzy in keeping my two babies cool and safe.

Literally, the three of us for most of that week.

On a positive note, the occasion would demonstrate that we have a tough little girl in our daughter who would remain in great spirits despite how exhausted her parents were. The end of the heat wave would coincide with us successfully registering and obtaining our second dose of Covid vaccinations, getting us one step closer to being fully vaccinated.

Beware the Strong Baby

While I initially commended my body for adapting extremely well to the heat, the sudden plummeting and normalization of temperatures would be too much for my now 30 year old body, causing me to fall sick.

This would be further aggravated by a jaw injury imparted to me as a gift by the “gentle” fists of my baby daughter. In what had been a playful habit where I would I allowed her to punch my face, the repeated strikes upon my jaw, pronounced by her new-found strength (thanks to her weight gain) weight would inflame my jaw.

The amusing part of it all being that she absolutely enjoyed punching the crap out of my jaw!
Reality of life

All of which brings me to where I am now, after a week of painkillers and jaw exercises, nearly ready to jump off and fly away from the proverbial tree that is university, with my thesis defense looming in the horizon.

Setting aside studies, I spend my days joyfully alternating between my new responsibilities as a father, while maintaining a constant spam of resumes that I email out to relevant job opportunities. So far, I haven’t had much success, but hey, a journey ain’t no fun without any challenges.

All the while, I strive to persevere and keep moving forward. while preserving my inner peace as per the words of the great master himself,

Becoming a Dad

In my previous post, I mentioned that there was a bigger story to my absence from the blog over the last few months. I guess the title has already spoiled the mystery.

Yes! I am now officially a Dad!

I’m still getting used to my friends and family teasing me on my newly acquired status but it is one that I’ve long yearned for, and I’m all the more happy for my wife and for us in that we have made it so far.

Our little one has been quite the storm and apart from uprooting our sleep cycle, she brings the greatest joy in our life in everything she is. I have to applaud my wonderful wife who has been a champion throughout all the struggles and complications we had to face in the earlier laps of this new journey in our life. Leina, you are absolutely amazing.

Being a Dad has been a unique experience and one that I have enjoyed so far. I can’t wait to confront all the fun challenges waiting just around the corner. Every day means something special and new to discover with our little one, and the atmosphere altogether has only made me relish the surprises she will continue to provide us in the long run.

As such, my absence over the last few months can largely be attributed to keeping up with my little one and managing the final strands of my doctoral studies that I’m now set to complete over the summer. All the hustle and bustle had me set aside my writing and artwork so that I may solely focus on what is most important: spending time with my baby daughter.

Interestingly, I have found greater inspiration in her company and enough so that I’m brimming with ideas to keep up and execute in posts that I wish to share in the blog alongside artwork and writing that I intend to complete.

In the weeks to follow, I hope to build on just that with The Pensive Reverie and The Procrastinating Scientist. With that said, I shall now return to the cute little giggles of my beautiful baby daughter who I just can’t get enough of. (As diaper monitor, it is also imperative I’m at her beck and call.)

I will see you all soon with a new story to share!

First Steps as a Science Writer

Hi everyone, it has been a while (there is a bigger story to this, which I will get to in my next post)!

Back in February, I published a post Getting Started in Science Writing where I discussed my efforts toward a career as a science writer. Since then, I have made decent progress, and had the gracious luck of finding a few opportunities to flex my science writing skills.

Today marked my first, very teeny-tiny step towards my goals as a science writer with my ComSciCon-CanWest submission being posted on their blog. The subject matter covers my own doctoral research: Mimicking photosynthesis in nature using metal nanoparticles.

The article is written in a manner that everyone can read it, regardless of their academic background. Hope you all get a chance to swing by and check in on the post and find out what I’ve been slogging on over the last four years of my life!

After a long and meaningful break, I will be back very soon this weekend. We have so much to catch up on!

The Final Lap

My doctoral studies commenced in Fall 2017. I wouldn’t have predicted then that the last 1.5 years of my PhD would involve a global pandemic. I have spent much of 2020 plus the last few months working from home, and contrary to the popular vote, time seems to have flown by.

I’m now on the final lap of my doctoral studies. Productivity and efficiency have been my daily mantra since my last post. It wasn’t easy, but after two weeks of 12 hour work cycles supplemented by some unhealthy snacks, energy drinks, and some encouraging music for company, I finished compiling my thesis. Thesis fatigue would soon set in afterward, and I would spend an additional week allowing my fried brain cells to recalibrate.

The break gave me much needed time to relax, get my sleep cycle back in line, and get back to normalcy. The finish line beckons with my doctoral defense looming in the near future but with my thesis writing complete, I can now have a balanced diet of studying while gradually ramping up my transition toward a post-doctoral career in writing and art.

That being said, I can now catch up on my initial slew of posts that I had intended prior to my study frenzy. There is much to be done and I intend to keep up with some nice stories I had planned to share with all of you alongside some new science to entertain on The Procrastinating Scientist, and artwork to post on my Instagram feed.

See you all again very soon!

Follow me on Instagram!

After attending the Lightbox Expo I was hard-pressed to start an Instagram account dedicated to my artwork. Aside from The Pensive Reverie and The Procrastinating Scientist, my presence on other social media platforms is sparse.

My lack of interest in social media notwithstanding I would be a bigger fool to deny that social media can be a productive resource on its own for individuals pursuing creative endeavors. Nevertheless, I was initially reluctant as I felt my art skills were too amateurish to warrant sharing my work in a public platform.

But, the journey is always a part of reaching our goals and destinations. Thus, I have decided to start an Instagram which will record my rare successes, frequent stumbles, and hilarious fails in my journey to be an artist.

Much of what I intend to share on Instagram will revolve around my growing art skills, my brief stints of inspiration, and whatever is the ensuing result when my ideas meet paper and pencil.

For those among my readers who are also active on Instagram, I would really appreciate your support by following my adventures on this platform as well. So, with that being said, here’s to a prosperous Instagram art journey at Ajay Peter Manuel@lockeinart.

They say the pen is mightier than the sword, let’s hope my pencil is equally mighty in reproducing the worlds that flourish in my brain.

2021 – Turning the page on 2020

Firstly, belated Happy New Year greetings to all my readers!!!

#one piece from •Anime is my World•

Shortly after my previous post at the end of November, I embarked on a PC building mission that I had been planning for nearly a year. After eight years of usage, my lovely laptop (a Lenovo G505s) deserved a break. It was also time that I switched gears to a PC to accommodate my personal aspirations in digital art and writing. The occasional gaming came as a bonus.

Being a complete amateur to building a PC, I spent much of November reading up on the parts required to build a system while planning my budget for the subsequent purchases. Though it seemed intimidating in the beginning, once the individual parts began to arrive, I couldn’t help but feel excited.

As Edmonton edged toward another Covid-19 lockdown mid-December, I bundled up all the parts onto my office space in my apartment and began building the PC. I was determined to finish the process over the course of a day, and I was mighty proud that I was able to. Reading up on the process as well as watching multiple Youtube videos of others’ mistakes beforehand really made a world of a difference.

I would succeed in completing the build by the afternoon and following a nerve wracking few minutes while turning on the power supply, I was elated to find that my efforts paid off in a fully functioning PC that is now geared with my favorite games, and digital art software.

livememe.com - Success Kid

Unfortunately, thanks to a sensitive nose and a sudden drop in temperatures the same day, I would end up falling sick the following day. It wouldn’t be until late December that my circadian rhythm would right itself amid the change in weather, setting me off on my path to recovery, and finally being able to use my PC.

Over the last week, I’ve enjoyed the near silent workspace environment of my PC amidst some much-needed gaming and writing to cap off 2020. The next four months will be important as I round up my doctoral studies, and even more importantly, as my wife and I expect the newest member of our family.  

2020 has been a tough year for many around the world. I’m thankful to the enduring support of my friends and family who have been so positive through it all. I’m also thankful to my loving wife who has been my strength and inspiration throughout this period. Stepping foot into 2021, I can’t wait to embark on a new journey with you and our little one. As a father-to-be, I intend to put to good use the sleepless nights that are to follow working on the final and most grueling phase of my graphic novel: drawing it all out. I also look forward to fully committing to a career in writing and animation following the completion of my doctoral studies.

As opposed to what may have been a very static 2020, I hope and wish 2021 will be a year of promising, and exciting transitions for everyone. I look forward to seeing you all in my follow up post where I shall detail my PC building process for those who are interested in building your very own PC from scratch.

Staying Afloat

The last few months have been positively engaging amid a busy schedule of activities from career networking, science writing conferences, symposiums, script writing, and a whole lot of research related to my PhD.

Rounding up the last lap of my doctoral studies, I had get as much work done as possible on relevant academic publications related to my thesis research. Amid the continuing restrictions posed by the pandemic, I couldn’t have gotten far in terms of progress had it not been for my peers and colleagues who have assisted me, and continue to do so, throughout this time period. I’m sincerely grateful for their efforts. Advancing into 2021, the weather forecast predicts books, and a whole lot of studying as I prepare for my thesis defense. All in all, I’ve kept busy and productive.

Studies aside, looking toward a post-academic future, career networking has been a must. I had a blast attending two stellar events in ScienceWriters2020 and ComSciConCanWest. Geared towards aspiring science writers, both events served as portals into the world of science writing. Though I couldn’t attend every single speaker session, the networking rooms offered by the two events were more than sufficient in providing a great sense of clarity toward pursuing a career in science communication and writing. I intend to have a separate post discussing both events for any aspiring science writers in my audience.

Much of the networking involved pretty much this as a first step with a more friendly and potentially rewarding approach.

Script writing concerning my graphic novel remains a slug fest but I can now see the light at the end of the tunnel. Weaving, ducking, and resolving the various plot holes and inconsistencies has helped me polish and fine tune the story to the best it can be. The script shall be ready by the end of the year, at which point the writing journey comes to an end and the artistic journey begins.

Staying afloat amid all of this seemed a daunting challenge but against the backdrop of joy and excitement as an expectant father, my doubts and uncertainties simply vanished. It has been an enlightening process supporting my lovely wife over the last few months of her pregnancy. Even more so, the experience has only increased my admiration and respect for her strength and patience through it all. The happiness of becoming a father notwithstanding, I can’t wait for all the sleepless nights that beckon in the near future. I’m sure I can put them to good use while simultaneously studying for my thesis defense.

That’s all for today folks! Catch you all at my next blog post!

The Art of Perseverance

When you arrive at a crossroad in life, you can guarantee that it will come with its fair share of mixed feelings and emotions. The last month has been just that amidst some giant leaps and developments in my personal life, and ergo, my absence from The Pensive Reverie. It has all been about perseverance amidst the changes that I expect moving forward (delightful as they are) in a committed relationship with my partner and one which will invite company in due time.

The experience has had far-reaching implications, often to hilarious effect, in various aspects of my life. From an adventurous sleeping cycle and a total re-organization of daily activities, the last month has kept me thinking if I’m back at the university dorms doing undergraduate studies.

Jokes aside, these recent developments have also led to difficult engagements in other aspects of my life largely revolving around family. Long back, I had written a post titled Constructing an Identity where I had identified myself as a third-culture kid.

Much of this was related to my experiences in traveling around the world to different countries throughout my teenage years, and the struggle that accompanied my efforts in balancing my cultural personality. Most of all,

I found the inability to openly discuss individual differences within my culture as a major obstacle in communication. Social interactions would rather become a form of control, followed by an equally weighted concern for internal, and external judgment.  

During a pandemic, when you are living in the opposite corner of the world from your family, things get a little difficult. So, needless to say, much of August has also involved a consistent dose of perseverance, now spanning several years, in dealing with tumultuous family dynamics.

Communication can be darn difficult especially in situations where you expect it to be easy. A dollop of a multicultural relationship, topped with differing ideals and perspectives, make the ensuing conversations even more difficult. Despite this, I find it necessary to persevere because after all family is family. August has been fruitful in that I was able to find a measure of closure concerning much of these issues.

With that being said, I will return very soon with a new post and updates about my latest efforts in writing my graphic novel, and artistic adventures.