Exams are an annual/semi-annual ritual most students have to experience at some point during school or university. I myself had to write one last week. While I came out mostly unscathed, this particular occasion was all the more memorable given that it was truly the final curtain for my academic career as far as written exams are concerned; this final exam, was in fact, the FINAL exam of my academic life.
While my 20-year-old counterpart would have relished and wildly celebrated such a reality, I came out of the exam hall feeling quite pensive about the whole affair. It felt like the end of a long and occasionally tortuous journey that had molded my personal perspectives and opinions about written exams, and the present-day state of education.
Back in high-school, I had considered written exams as a means to test my skills and challenge my wits. By the time I had finished undergraduate studies, my viewpoint changed drastically, with written exams no longer being my cup of tea. I attributed this to the rapid environment that is university studies where exams just became another thing on that long checklist of things to do. Accompanied by tight and narrow margins of assignments and course project deadlines, written exams and studying evolved into a race against time, a means to a letter, than an actual endeavor for knowledge. I would finish my undergraduate studies quite frustrated with how things had turned about.
Ironically enough, those very frustrations set the ground for positive aspirations in the future. A few years after my BSc. degree, I would obtain an MSc. degree, following which I would begin my doctoral studies. Written exams still remained a part of my academic life but something changed. It took me a while to figure it out, but in the end, it was quite simple. I came to the realization that written exams are full of shit.
It became quite evident that my exam writing skills didn’t correlate nor were they directly transferable to improving and supplementing my academic experience or my aptitude for research. In my case, I stumbled upon this solution in the most straightforward manner possible: working as a research assistant for one year and proving to myself that I was actually “worthy” of my academic aspirations. Yet, there should have been no reason for me to be pressured into proving this to myself.
While written exams are popularly utilized as a means to weed out the student population in a hierarchical system of academic merit, it is not by any means the most efficient. On the other hand, it has served its purpose as the great illusion that often daunts a student’s psyche with regards to being an indirect and ineffective statement on their potential, and future success.
Multiple cases in point were my encounters with various students and peers who would find average turnovers in exams, and yet remain gifted personalities with great intellects and potential. It wasn’t rare to see the same batch of students also diverge from their original academic aspirations thanks to the lack of representation that written exams (and consequently, their grades) provided for their resume.
The sheer stress and pressure of exams translated to my transcript which to this date remains a beautiful collage of letters traversing the ABCDF scheme of the grading alphabet. Those same factors also translated to an inferiority complex of sorts, culminating in the completion of my undergraduate degree, when I felt that I was not good enough for my field of choice, and that I didn’t have the potential to seek and find success at greater heights.
It took me several years to overcome this complex. It helped to recognize written exams were not the absolute judgment of one’s potential as the education system so often makes it seem. I had to admit to myself that neither my skills or potential were absolutely defined by a piece of paper that I had to complete in a closed-room environment under set rules. This pushed me to work harder, not at writing exams or getting perfect grades, but at learning to enjoy my own pursuit of knowledge including its ups and downs.
Leaving the exam hall last week, I was glad that I had finished writing my final “final.” I could now look forward to fully and freely engaging my curiosity for knowledge, in whatever form that may be. I’m thankful to have come so far. My success in overcoming my failures in such a systematic hierarchy could largely be attributed to supportive supervisors, professors, friends, and most of all, my loving family. The trials and tribulations I faced in what had once seemed a downhill adventure in self-confidence and motivation did enact a toll upon my university studies, and yet, those very same experiences had served to strengthen me.
At the end of the day, my story may not be another’s. As such, I find it necessary in the current educational climate to find an alternative to written exams (at least in the context of university studies) in an effort to better represent and evaluate a student’s skills and knowledge. In my humble opinion, I would prefer to take the classical approach of the platonic academy where the emphasis towards knowledge and one’s academic mettle were proven through oral arguments and jousts that served to strengthen one’s ability to communicate and defend his opinions, as well as learn from that of others in what could be a collectively reinforcing experience.
I have had the opportunity to be involved in few such courses during my time at university, and have also found them to be the most rewarding. How to mold such an idea into a central gear in the current education system is a whole other problem in itself, and not one that I intend to discuss at this stage (though I do intend to come back to it soon enough).
Having said this, for now, I’m going to sit back, drink a cup of tea, enjoy the view (free of exams and assignments, but mostly a busy week catching up on research), and,
The Pensive Reverie 